1. I am a mom.
I’ve always been somewhat of a worry wart. In most situations, I let my mind wander to every possible outcome, often negative. This is something I am working everyday to change about myself. A part of me feels so blessed for everything that I have in my life, that sometimes I am left wondering, when is my luck going to change?
Being a mom was something I’ve wanted my whole life. Before I became pregnant I often worried that I wouldn’t be able to even become pregnant. My mother had trouble conceiving, so I always knew it was possible that I could have the same problems. When I ended up getting pregnant fairly quickly, I worried constantly throughout my pregnancy. I was researching everything and anything I put in or on my body, and although I had a relatively enjoyable pregnancy, the responsibility was scary.
The day Qwynn was born was one of the happiest, most long awaited days of my life. I never imagined all the emotions that would flood through me holding my little baby girl for the first time. Remembering that moment makes it even harder to imagine the pain and emotions someone goes through when they lose a child, especially one so young. My heart truly aches for all those moms that have lost their babies, no matter what the cause. I may have never had a child with cancer, but I do know the love a mom has for her child and I don’t know what I would do if mine was ever taken from me.
When I looked up The Ronan Thompson Foundation for the first time, I was mesmerized by this beautiful little boy with these amazing blue eyes that sparkled so bright. As a mother, I of course think my daughter is the most beautiful little human in the world, and I cannot even begin to imagine my life without her.
2. I was inspired by an amazing friend.
I have some pretty amazing coworkers and friends who inspire me to think about things that I otherwise would have probably never thought about. I still remember when my friend Emily first told me about Ronan. Her love and compassion for a little boy she never even met was absolutely fascinating to me. Her courage and passion to do anything to help raise awareness for more childhood cancer research is definitely contagious. I may not have been as brave as her to run all around NYC telling people about the lack of funding for childhood cancer, but only for Emmy would I cover my face in gold glitter and record myself dancing for anyone to see.
Something Emily has told me numerous times in our conversations about childhood cancer has really stuck with me…If these little kids can fight cancer, if they are brave enough to fight for their lives everyday, then there is no reason I, as an adult, can’t do something that is uncomfortable or scary to me.
I have not and will never forget this.
3. I wanted to step outside my comfort zone.
Pretty much since I can remember I’ve been a shy person. I am super critical of myself and wonder what other people are thinking about me way more than I should. I get super anxious in social situations, especially large groups. I didn’t have a lot of friends in school and I’ve never found it easy to talk to new people.
Although I wasn’t able to get out there and personally talk to people about childhood cancer, what I loved about this challenge is that it did get me to step outside my comfort zone. It forced me to simply let go. I didn’t worry about making a fool of myself on video. I didn’t worry about what other people might think about me putting this out there. I simply relished in the feeling of acting like a kid again. A feeling that all kids should be able to experience. The feeling of running around my parents backyard, bare feet in the grass, dancing with my nieces, sister and daughter. It is an experience I will carry with me for the rest of my life.